Frustrated?
You’re probably headed in the right direction.
What if I told you that frustration is actually a crucial part of the process of growth?
That by embracing the challenges and setbacks, you can accelerate your learning and development in ways you never thought possible?
If you can wrap your mind around this concept, you’ll improve much faster in your work as a leader, bring a little kindness to your own experience, and—because you’re growing faster—you’ll have a greater impact and get promoted faster.
It may sound counterintuitive, but the research supports this idea.
Studies in psychology and neuroscience have shown that when we encounter difficulties or failures, our brains are forced to create new neural connections in order to find a solution. This process of adaptation is what ultimately leads to growth and improvement.
I’ve recently started practicing aikido, and as I learn a new technique, I often feel like I’m getting worse. That’s because, as my Sensei puts it, my awareness is growing faster than my skill.
And it isn’t limited to just aikido. This the gap between awareness and skill arises in all the areas of my life where I’m growing: As a business owner. As a coach. As a parent.
Sometimes that gap can be really frustrating.
But that frustration is part of the process. This is important to acknowledge, because otherwise it’s easy for me to get stuck.
At least it used to be.
In 2016, I read Carol Dwek’s fascinating book, Mindset, and it changed the way I look at things.
From Mindset I learned the difference between having a fixed and a growth mindset.
The fixed mindset is an aspect of the judging mind that evaluates my outcomes and often (if you’re a self-critical high achiever like me) determines that I’ve fallen short of my goals.
The growth mindset is a belief that life unfolds as a process. And, in the realm of growth, frustration happens because, by definition, I’m trying new things.
Rather than get tripped up by frustration, I can acknowledge it and work past it from a paradigm of growth.
This is important because knowing this can help me stay the course, especially as I encounter new and fresh challenges.
But here’s the catch: not all forms of frustration are helpful. If the frustration is overwhelming and leads to feelings of hopelessness or helplessness, it can actually hinder growth and even lead to burnout. In these cases, seeking support and guidance from others can be crucial.
So how can we embrace the kind of frustration that leads to growth, while avoiding the kind that holds us back? Here are a few tips:
- Embrace a growth mindset. As I mentioned earlier, a growth mindset is a belief that life unfolds as a process. Rather than getting tripped up by frustration or setbacks, we can acknowledge them as a natural part of the learning process and work past them.
- Seek out challenges. If you’re always sticking to what you know and avoiding anything that feels difficult or uncomfortable, you’re not going to grow much. Seek out challenges that push you outside your comfort zone and force you to adapt and learn.
- Get support when you need it. If the frustration is overwhelming or you’re struggling to find a way forward, don’t be afraid to seek support from others. This might mean working with a coach, finding a mentor, or just talking things through with a trusted friend or colleague.
- Watch my video, Why Frustration is a Part of Growth, and remember that frustration is often a sign that you’re on the right path.
So, the next time you’re feeling frustrated by the challenges in your life, remember that this is a sign that you’re on the right path. By embracing the frustration as a natural part of the learning process, you can accelerate your growth and development in ways you never thought possible.
If you’re someone who needs support to tackle the challenges that are most important to you, reach out. Go to clearfieldgroup.com and click the link to book a call. You don’t have to do this alone.